Creativity.... Is it a lost cause?

Here's a little tid-bit about me: I've always believed in the creating of something original... of finding the one voice that can project everything you have to say. At art school.... I felt as though there were more imitators than actual creators... People taking an idea and putting a spin on it to make it more interesting for the briefest moment to suck in a viewer, but after that moment all the magic is lost because you can see the worn down fabric of its creation start to pop out from underneath the glossy finish the "creator" has applied.

Every single day I saw something that was "borrowed" from someone else... To the point where I could not discern where the initial idea had come from. I'm not saying spreading ideas is bad, it's a great thing! But, for example, when you're recycling previous ideas of feminism & womanhood from 10 years back without creating anything new... Where do you find yourself? Ten years back.

The point I'm trying to get across is we are stuck in a game where we think we can win but it's disillusioning, finding yourself standing over a trap door. So what is 'new'? New is that feeling you get when you're not supposed to shoplift but you find yourself doing it just to feel that rush of adrenaline pumping through your veins as you walk through the security pillars, out the automatic door daunting you with the idea that your head will be chopped off should you be caught... But realizing you got away with it as you slowly sink back down to Earth.

I had this idea form in my head... After a few months at Ringling School of Art Design (before it was revamped making it qualify for federal funding - oh please, like this pack of wolves needs anymore technology to cause cancer in their brains) ...I had this idea implanted in my head, by people I will not name, that art is a rolling ball, one thing triggers another, another, and another... what if a trigger goes off too soon? Or too late? Then I read an article debating if there is such a thing as creativity? Or are we a society based on innovation? From what I gathered from the author's attitude... Innovation is a dirty word. It makes me think of dirty socks, you know, the crusty pair that you've been wearing for a little over a week that gradually soften the more your foot sweats? Yeah, that pair.

After 4 years of being told what is hot & what is not... I still find myself asking the same question. Soooo... what hasn't been done? So I know what to make to make a million bucks? I still find asking myself the same questions I had before college. There are no answers anywhere. So how in the dark lord's name did this group of big wigs coherse me into paying obscene amounts of money to attend classes and listen to people who say "This is the way you got to do it to get here." Well, where is here? Because I'm still stuck back there and I can smell the moldy socks from here.

With this said, here are two links that address the idea of creativity with debating points as to if such thing still exists or if we're just recycling.

http://curiosity.discovery.com/question/innovation-creativity-still-have-meaning

http://curiosity.discovery.com/question/comfort-less-creative#mkcpgn=fbcur1

Maybe I am just rattling on to the breeze... But I have made my decision a long time ago... With so much history behind us what's been done what hasn't been done - how do we know when we've created something trully original? ...When we make a million dollars and there's a hand full of knock offs.

Have a good day! :)

Commitment... Is Daunting.

For this first time in a long time I've decided I'm going to stick with something longer than a week, a couple months, or a few years. First being life... Second being the protective bubble I've built around myself... That bubble I call my world via my art. My drawing skill, my photographic eye, or the way I can orchestrate shape and color into an abstract mess to embrace this person they call 'Sarah'. Whatever you want to call it... I call it home & absolute freedom, where consequences exist but nobody feels the brunt of emotional, physical, or mental pain. This may not be art to some people... but I don't care about those people.

With this said I have to decided to take on the endeavor.... To commit to an idea. My idea. This will be proof to anyone who reads it that at least I can say what is on my mind, believe it, and stick with it because I will no longer live in the HUGE shadow that has be placed above my head - either from my own actions or of those around me - no more shadows of fear. I've noticed throughout the years the fear I harbor has caused me to lose contact with people I care about, morphed the face I knew into that of my darkest demons, and has caused me to let the dreams I hold so dear to slip from reach. I can see them vaguely from here... but I've let myself down. I've broken my own heart in fear of what the future holds because I know. It's time to stop committing to knowing & instead I commit to myself through being myself.

In conclusion, I am Sarah Nicole Graves - some of you will only ever know me as Scareah Diggin' Graves - those of you who do, do not stand a chance.

To be a SUNFLOWER

Thank you Sunny Balliette for introducing me to this movie. After 4 years of a life dealing with the last video...It's hard not to feel dead & I feel as though this video is a warm hug. Maude's character is a warm hug to the numb character of Harold. A boy who has never learned to live for himself because he's become numb to any & everything. People don't appreciate what they have when it's given to them on a silver, frozen platter. Too many graves in the labor room. Go outside, blow some bubbles, pee in the outdoors, start a little trouble, shake things up a bit... You'll never be happy if you keep saying you never tried.

good morning mizz AH-merikaka!

<3

Thank you to my dear friend Mizz Heather Dollirous Cupcakenstein for introducing me to this movie... Where I was surprisingly shocked by Mcculley & Seth's fabulous performance as club kids. Way to go Seth for stabbing him with the truth to the face. Sucks to die alone, knowing no one cares. Sadly too many people suffer from this disease.

hi.